This past weekend my parents and their pups came to visit for the first time since we moved down here (what 20 days ago??) As happy as I was to have them visit I was just as happy to see them go. I love them but we get along much better when we aren't living together! My mother and I did some shopping nearly all of which she insisted on paying for. She purchased her new "granddog's" (who we hope to join us later this week) bed and water dish as well as groceries, homemade jam from our farmer's market, as well as a bunch of other things that I tried to convince her we didn't "really" need. As much as I appreciate her wanting to help us, I hate that I feel constantly indebted to her for everything. I try to tell her if we can't afford something then it's just not a priority. We can afford anything that we truly "need".
(The GIANT bump) In Nov my mother purchased an ADORABLE table and chairs set of my choice for my son. Knowing that we were to move in less than 2 months we left the table and chairs set in their box from the manufacturer and made sure to keep it safe until the move. We made sure it was safely packed and moved it into our apartment immediately and put it aside to keep it safe from being beaten up until all the furniture was placed and there was room to assemble it.. Well yesterday morning I opened the box and oou'd and ahh'd at the adorable pieces... and then I opened the box with in the box that held the table top and my heart broke..... The entire tabletop is destroyed. It really looks like the damage was done before it was put into the packaging but I have no way of proving that. With the time that has passed (over 2 months) I feel like there is so little hope of having it replaced for free by the company that sold it or by the manufacturer... but I am in the midst of drafting an email to send to them. Ohhh how I hope they will replace the table top. I rarely ask for anything.. especially anything new.. but my mother offered to buy him a table and chairs set for a Christmas/birthday gift and this one just stole my heart. I just cannot shake this feeling that I'm going to be told I"m SOL and that I should have opened the package and checked it as soon as it arrived... I really thought I was doing the right thing leaving it "safe" in its box.. Please let the manufacturer stand behind its product and just apologize for a "lemon" and replace the table top.
(The other massive bump) DH decided that the job he just took a few days before was not going to work out. We didn't even have the opportunity to stock up on things we buy only from that store (plus groceries and clothing) with his 15% employee discount.. So now we are again a family of 3 with no income and it makes me feel beside myself. Yes, while people starve and die from disease, I'm concerned about how nice my son's bedroom looks and whether or not we have an extra 15% off our grocery bill. I *try* to convince myself we can make this work while my husband finishes his degree but I'm so incredibly filled with doubt. I don't know what to do with myself. To get a job myself I would have to give up sleeping. My husband's schedule is so crazy with school and his studies he cannot be responsible for our son... that is why I quit my job a little over a year ago.
To get a full time job I would have to put my son into daycare, which just is not an option. I tried to nanny another family's child and that did not last, not to mention it has put fear of ever trying it again into my mind. I could put some of my things on craigslist/ebay but I just don't have nice things that anyone would really want. My clothes are worn and stained, my dishes scratched and chipped, my furniture beaten from the 4 moves in 4 years. Things that I don't think I will use I donate and hate the thought of stopping that practice. I feel much better knowing clothing that doesn't fit is going to someone who needs it than to making a few dollars at a yard sale. I keep thinking about putting some of my home-made crafts onto etsy but I fear I will make something too close to something someone else has made and get into trouble for "stealing" their ideas. I've been learning how to knit and crochet but the yarn I have is old and not the best quality. I had been hoping to make baby and child hats and clothing lined with perhaps something like fleece and donate them.
I suppose I should busy myself with some of these ideas to plow through my yarn stash so that I have room for a few nice skeins to make things worth buying. Perhaps in stead of worrying about using my scrapbooking supplies for a scrapbook for pictures I don't want to spend money on printing I could make home-made cards to sell. Of course am I even going to make back the money I spent on the supplies if I sell them at a reasonable price that someone would be willing to spend? I suppose if I can't sell them I can always use them, right?
This would be a horrible time to mention I've been wishing for a whole different kind of "bump"... the kind that results in a new baby. The past six months I've found myself feeling physically and emotionally ready to expand our family. I found myself at peace with the traumatic birth of our first child and stopped taking blame for the birth not going as I had hoped and was comforted with the healthy baby boy it resulted in. DH wants to hear nothing of the thoughts of another child right now, and for good reason having no income and living off of our savings. Of course this readiness for another child myself comes from a much deeper place than just my consciousness that understands what makes the most financial sense. My body was ready before my brain was. I found myself experiencing many symptoms of a hysterical pregnancy. Having not had a milk supply in going on a year I was absolutely shocked to find myself leaking every time I saw a baby or even did so much as think about a baby.
We are in the midst of trying to adopt a dog... my husband's idea of meeting me half way on the idea of a new baby I suppose. Someone new to love and take care of, not to mention someone to drag me out of the house to exercise. I JUST refreshed my email to find out that our home inspection will be Thurs afternoon.. which I hope to result in the pup being placed with us. I'm so happy to find a dog rescue that is SO concerned with how their dogs are placed. If only all animals had such wonderful chances at finding loving homes.
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