I feel like my mind is in a permanent state of panic and anxiety. Panic over money, panic over the future, panic over the stability of our family, panic over the thoughts of going back to work and saying goodbye to the days of being at home with my son.... Panic panic panic.
Eventually the panic gives way to full on shut down of my brain. Someone... please lead me to my bed. I would like to just crawl in and hibernate for a few years until our problems are all solved or we are living on the street. Ok, so we'd never really wind up on the street... but sometimes the thought of having to ask to live with one of our parents sounds worse than sleeping on a park bench somewhere.
I've spent a ton of time in the past few weeks reading job requirements (yes, there is actually work here) and coming to the same depressing reality that I'm not qualified for them or they pay so little I wouldn't be able to afford an accredited daycare/preschool. The night jobs are all heavy lifting jobs meant for big strapping young men and aren't near by (nor are they in a terrific area to work late at night.) I finally found a work at home job that had great reviews and was very flexible and had a great pay scale. Great, right? Why yes, yes it is... for all the people who applied and were hired. I found a post by a woman in my mom's group with a few links to openings, but by the time I clicked the links the positions were filled!
People keep suggesting nannying or an in-home daycare... I tried that once.. and maybe it was the extenuating circumstances in my life... or maybe I just wasn't the best match for the little one I was working with... but it was a disaster. Lets not even bother to mention I was only charging $7 or $9 an hour... and what was supposed to be in my home turned into me dealing with rush hour traffic first thing in the morning and took close to an hour to get to for only a couple hours of pay. The few people I know that I would gladly baby-sit for when they need it... I wouldn't want to take money from. I have a horrible time taking money from anyone even when I earn it.
I keep coming back to my etsy shop and keep making attempts to make things for it. I have a stack of beaded bracelets, several pairs of earnings and some baby wash cloths ready to list... I don't know what it is but I'm having trouble getting myself to list them. I don't know if it's fear of failure... fear that I don't realize how much my products suck (I really do try to have high standards for what I make) and people are going to be disappointed... who the heck knows.
If my shop fails (or in addition to it if we need additional income as I know sales can be slow) I'll probably wind up posting my info on my mom's group for people who need some house work done and who are willing to deal with a crazy and constantly changing schedule (due to hubby's schedule) and occasional flakeyness when we will all undoubtedly get sick.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Yarn Along
Joining Small Thing's Yarn Along again this week!
Sorry for the sideway photos... I took them right off my camera unable to change them. I'm knitting gnomes this week. So much for not knitting so much.. this heat is killing me! Plus, they knit up so quickly! I found the pattern from another yarn along-er's blog Plain and Joyful Living, here is a link for anyone who is interested. I've never really been able to follow a pattern so the fact that mine came together ok was a real motivator for me to keep playing with the pattern. I made a plain "doll" form by changing some of the stitches, making some increases and decreases here and there. In the second picture that's the beginning of a giant gnome. I'm not positive what I'm going to do with them all yet... Alex has already claimed the lavender and small green one as his but I think the big gnome may be a big sister gift for a friend who is having a baby and maybe two little ones for the younger "big" siblings.
Still reading the same book as last week. I actually really enjoy it because it's more like a book of short stories. It was actually written from Carl Sagan's writings after he passed away so some of the chapters seem like they're just short copies of his musings on different subjects. My husband thinks I will especially enjoy the chapter written by his wife.
For those of you who read my post last week and are interested in a weight update, I am DOWN from last week. Wiifit makes it difficult to tell exactly how much since it goes up and down (or maybe that's just me and not understanding completely how it works.) but I think I'm down somewhere between 6-8 lbs. It's progress :-)
Sorry for the sideway photos... I took them right off my camera unable to change them. I'm knitting gnomes this week. So much for not knitting so much.. this heat is killing me! Plus, they knit up so quickly! I found the pattern from another yarn along-er's blog Plain and Joyful Living, here is a link for anyone who is interested. I've never really been able to follow a pattern so the fact that mine came together ok was a real motivator for me to keep playing with the pattern. I made a plain "doll" form by changing some of the stitches, making some increases and decreases here and there. In the second picture that's the beginning of a giant gnome. I'm not positive what I'm going to do with them all yet... Alex has already claimed the lavender and small green one as his but I think the big gnome may be a big sister gift for a friend who is having a baby and maybe two little ones for the younger "big" siblings.
Still reading the same book as last week. I actually really enjoy it because it's more like a book of short stories. It was actually written from Carl Sagan's writings after he passed away so some of the chapters seem like they're just short copies of his musings on different subjects. My husband thinks I will especially enjoy the chapter written by his wife.
For those of you who read my post last week and are interested in a weight update, I am DOWN from last week. Wiifit makes it difficult to tell exactly how much since it goes up and down (or maybe that's just me and not understanding completely how it works.) but I think I'm down somewhere between 6-8 lbs. It's progress :-)
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Yarn Along
Joining Small Thing's Yarn Along again this week.
First off I'd like to apologize yet again for my terrible pictures... I really need to convince one of the cameras in our home that it likes to take close up pictures in doors with terrible lighting......
*gasp!* Could it be?! A book?!?! Why yes, yes it is. I recently picked out the book Billions & Billions Thoughts on Life and Death at the Brink of the Millennium by Carl Sagan from my husband's "library". The fact that it was sitting next to The Faynman Lectures on Physics that my husband reads just for fun made me assume that it would be way over my head. However, so far it is not... there's even a little cartoon drawing on page 8 to breakdown the idea of having to count to three hundred seventy eight billion and two.... I've enjoyed what I've read but I'm reading it very slowly... Every time I'm interrupted (which is quite often) I go back and read what I had just finished reading so that I'm not losing any of what is said.
I've done about as much knitting and crocheting this week as I normally would have done in a "normal" day. I finished a washcloth that was more than half way done and casted on the one in the first picture. I'm trying to concentrate my me time to things that are physically more important than my sanity (which is what my crafting maintains.) Anyone that knows BMIs and can see what those numbers are knows that I'm in trouble. I live on a relatively strict diet and try to consume no more than 1.500 calories in a given day. The max number given to me by my diabetic health nurse when I took a course on diabetes nutrition was 1,650 calories per day. I try (and fail horribly) not to beat myself up over numbers (pounds) when it comes to my weight and I try to focus on my blood sugar and how I physically feel when it comes to my energy. If I maintain good energy and a healthy blood sugar level I have the ability to loose additional weight. If I loose 20 lbs and still feel like garbage I'm going to spend a lot of time sitting around doing nothing and slowly the weight will just come back. It's hard though to not get excited when I see -2.4 pounds... My mind automatically goes to hey if I lose 5 lbs a month I can loose over 50 lbs in a year and be skinny in 2 years! Then I gain a pound, cry (even though I know weight fluctuates more than that in a day) and spend the day mopeing around.... and no, that's not me being sarcastic that 1 lousy pound destroys my self esteem... I had a melt down over 1 pound just last week.
That all being said I may not be getting very much knitting done for the rest of the summer.. I don't handle heat well due to some health issues I have and with 100+ degree weather I'm staying inside where it's hard to find quiet exercises that wont bother my downstairs neighbors. I've been pulling some very late nights (or does 5 AM make it a painfully early morning??) when it's semi-cool in here, trying to be active (our home has never been cleaner.) I am so looking forward to fall when it cools down and I can go walking outside. We live feet from a lake and two parks and a mile from a very nice library. It kills me that I can't deal with the heat long enough to take my son all of those places. I went to take the dogs out around 1PM the other day and felt like my entire body hit a wall half way down the 3 flights of stairs... it was so hot I felt like I was going to pass out. In normal weather I can take those stairs full speed up and down with out losing my breath..... Oh how I wish we had moved north instead of south!
First off I'd like to apologize yet again for my terrible pictures... I really need to convince one of the cameras in our home that it likes to take close up pictures in doors with terrible lighting......
That all being said I may not be getting very much knitting done for the rest of the summer.. I don't handle heat well due to some health issues I have and with 100+ degree weather I'm staying inside where it's hard to find quiet exercises that wont bother my downstairs neighbors. I've been pulling some very late nights (or does 5 AM make it a painfully early morning??) when it's semi-cool in here, trying to be active (our home has never been cleaner.) I am so looking forward to fall when it cools down and I can go walking outside. We live feet from a lake and two parks and a mile from a very nice library. It kills me that I can't deal with the heat long enough to take my son all of those places. I went to take the dogs out around 1PM the other day and felt like my entire body hit a wall half way down the 3 flights of stairs... it was so hot I felt like I was going to pass out. In normal weather I can take those stairs full speed up and down with out losing my breath..... Oh how I wish we had moved north instead of south!
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Yarn Along
Joining in on Small Thing's Yarn Along again this week.
Since last week the never ending blanket has received a few more rows and I'm now ready to move onto the next stripe of color. I know I would loose count after about 2 minutes if I ever tried, but I'd like to know how many stitches are in each row. I get so sick of seeing the same color over and over again that I'm always relieved to go to the next stripe color. I realized on about the last row of this past stripe that I must have some how purchased the wrong yarn and did nearly an entire stripe with the wrong yarn! Considering that stripe took me about 3 months to get through with all the other things I had going.... it's going to stay incorrect. This blanket was the first crocheted thing I ever started so I know the beginning is all wonky anyway. It's a blanket... that has already started showing the signs of being in a house full of dogs and a little boy (how did finger paint make it to the carpet and the blanket????). My husband warns me that he plans to sit wrapped in it while he studies and eats and he plans to make a horrible mess of it... so I'm not stressing how perfect it is and trying not to think about how much yarn (money) and time have gone into this darn thing. Some days I'm ready to fasten it off and give it to my husband to start abusing. He says he'd happily wrap it around himself like a mummy (it's current shape and size would be similar to a giant scarf.)
I knitted up a few trial baby wash cloths in attempts of making a "perfect" one so that I could make a set of matching baby wash cloths and create a little bath set for a gift. So many "friends" are currently expecting and I would like to have something to give them. So far out of the 3 I've made they're all different.. I keep buggering up the edges. I'll accidentally do too many knit row on one edge and too few on the next. I fear I'll never get out of the basic stockinette or knit projects... no fancy edges... just lucky if I manage to get the edges even. I'm somewhat jealous of other people's posts about "nap time knitting" or knitting after their child goes to bed. On the other hand I kind of like that he's always awake and here with me. If he was sleeping a lot, I'd be alone with my thoughts more. My little guy sleeps very little (no naps and we're lucky for him to sleep 8 hours through the night) so all of my knitting is with him racing around and sometimes physically pulling my work out of my hands so he can climb into my lap (or onto my head.. which ever he's feeling like doing.) I've been pulling some very late nights to get ontop of my house work and some other crafting projects other than knitting... some days I feel like I can barely see straight... no surprise that my knitting isn't perfect. The adults in this home are extremely stressed... extremely. I wont bore you with the details
No major reading again this week unless you count the hours of children's books reading and pulling out my anatomy books to help my husband with something for one of his classes. It's rare that I'm able to help him with something. For the most part, I've been too concentrated on what I've been doing around the apartment to do any real reading. I did happen to watch a documentary during some of my alone time that I HIGHLY recommend. It's called My Flesh and Blood (it's on netflix) and it follows single mom who raises 9 (?) special needs children that she has adopted for a year. It's a tear jerker for sure. I've always wanted to adopt and have considered adopting a special needs child, so to me it was very interesting. It is extremely sad... but worth watching in my opinion. I got so into it that I barely got any knitting done. It reminded me of the six years I spent working in an alternative school program.. not necessarily in a good way, but it's always nice (in a way) to be reminded of how good I have it and how lucky I am.
Since last week the never ending blanket has received a few more rows and I'm now ready to move onto the next stripe of color. I know I would loose count after about 2 minutes if I ever tried, but I'd like to know how many stitches are in each row. I get so sick of seeing the same color over and over again that I'm always relieved to go to the next stripe color. I realized on about the last row of this past stripe that I must have some how purchased the wrong yarn and did nearly an entire stripe with the wrong yarn! Considering that stripe took me about 3 months to get through with all the other things I had going.... it's going to stay incorrect. This blanket was the first crocheted thing I ever started so I know the beginning is all wonky anyway. It's a blanket... that has already started showing the signs of being in a house full of dogs and a little boy (how did finger paint make it to the carpet and the blanket????). My husband warns me that he plans to sit wrapped in it while he studies and eats and he plans to make a horrible mess of it... so I'm not stressing how perfect it is and trying not to think about how much yarn (money) and time have gone into this darn thing. Some days I'm ready to fasten it off and give it to my husband to start abusing. He says he'd happily wrap it around himself like a mummy (it's current shape and size would be similar to a giant scarf.)
I knitted up a few trial baby wash cloths in attempts of making a "perfect" one so that I could make a set of matching baby wash cloths and create a little bath set for a gift. So many "friends" are currently expecting and I would like to have something to give them. So far out of the 3 I've made they're all different.. I keep buggering up the edges. I'll accidentally do too many knit row on one edge and too few on the next. I fear I'll never get out of the basic stockinette or knit projects... no fancy edges... just lucky if I manage to get the edges even. I'm somewhat jealous of other people's posts about "nap time knitting" or knitting after their child goes to bed. On the other hand I kind of like that he's always awake and here with me. If he was sleeping a lot, I'd be alone with my thoughts more. My little guy sleeps very little (no naps and we're lucky for him to sleep 8 hours through the night) so all of my knitting is with him racing around and sometimes physically pulling my work out of my hands so he can climb into my lap (or onto my head.. which ever he's feeling like doing.) I've been pulling some very late nights to get ontop of my house work and some other crafting projects other than knitting... some days I feel like I can barely see straight... no surprise that my knitting isn't perfect. The adults in this home are extremely stressed... extremely. I wont bore you with the details
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| Spot bot and potty in the background... Thankfully the spot bot is only out because of a dog getting sick.. Alex hasn't had an accident in quite a while!! |
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Yarn Along
Joining Small Thing's Yarn Along again this week. Since finishing my projects for Knit for Japan (that were finally mailed out yesterday) I've had trouble finding a crocheting/knitting project to get into. A low yarn supply isn't helping. I hope to get my t-shirt yarn cut soon so I can start a rag rug.
I've done some teeny tiny flowers using embroidery floss meant for a piece for my mom's birthday, since I doubt the swiffer covers are going to happen. I think I finally have a little rhythm down for making them but they're still not quite what I envisioned. However, I have plenty of embroidery floss from my cousin's friendship bracelet making days that she passed on to me a few years ago.
I've also picked up the never ending blanket again... Still on the same band of color I was months ago but in the past 2 days I think I've finished 3 or 4 rows.... It doesn't sound like much but the rows take at least an hour and a half to get through.
Not much news on the moving front... We wont know for sure until mid-March at the earliest. So far from what my husband has been reading about his top 8 picks (4 masters only programs and 4 PHD programs) and their acceptances, Virginia seems to be the most likely possibility. However, if he keeps up his 4.0GPA, I doubt he's really going to have any trouble getting into 7 out of the 8 schools he choose.... however GRE scores will tell us more. Ok, enough of that, I'm tired of thinking about it! It's going to be another less than 2 months of notice on where we have to move to (or not have to move at all if he goes somewhere around here) and there's not a darn thing I can do about it!
I've done some teeny tiny flowers using embroidery floss meant for a piece for my mom's birthday, since I doubt the swiffer covers are going to happen. I think I finally have a little rhythm down for making them but they're still not quite what I envisioned. However, I have plenty of embroidery floss from my cousin's friendship bracelet making days that she passed on to me a few years ago.
I've also picked up the never ending blanket again... Still on the same band of color I was months ago but in the past 2 days I think I've finished 3 or 4 rows.... It doesn't sound like much but the rows take at least an hour and a half to get through.
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| Even only a few feet on it at least someone can curl up in it... |
Not much news on the moving front... We wont know for sure until mid-March at the earliest. So far from what my husband has been reading about his top 8 picks (4 masters only programs and 4 PHD programs) and their acceptances, Virginia seems to be the most likely possibility. However, if he keeps up his 4.0GPA, I doubt he's really going to have any trouble getting into 7 out of the 8 schools he choose.... however GRE scores will tell us more. Ok, enough of that, I'm tired of thinking about it! It's going to be another less than 2 months of notice on where we have to move to (or not have to move at all if he goes somewhere around here) and there's not a darn thing I can do about it!
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Crafting
I spent nearly two hours "organizing" (more playing than organizing probably) my old crafting supplies today with my little guy.. I had a big bin of this and that from my childhood crafting days. I know there's at least a little bit more coming my way the next time my parent's visit so it was motivation to go through my unorganized bin and see what I had that I didn't remember. Gimp, plastic beads, part of my beading loom (I hope the second part comes with the stuff from my parent's house), a bunch of shaped sponges for stamping with paint (those went into the kiddos' crafting supplies), a few styrofoam balls, 3 or 4 tiny little ribbon flowers (SCORE), a few wooden crafting pieces, some antique drawing pencils, potholder loops (but no loom :-( ) and more seashells than I'll probably ever use. I'm thinking about using the styrofoam balls and shells to make some more shell covered balls, but after they're done I'm hoping to pare down my shells to only my favorite ones. The ribbon flowers went into my crafting hutch along with a few googley eyes, wooden pieces and some teeny pom poms... The gimp and plastic beads.... back in the bin for now. I should really set up a crafting supply swap with my mom's group.
I pulled out a Christmas ornament making kit that looked simple. I'm not sure if it's something that I'll want to keep or not.. but it's something to keep my hands busy. I haven't been able to really get into a project since all of my knitting and crocheting for the Knit for Japan project. I still have to finish my hat but I think everything else is just about ready to go. I really need to rewatch that youtube video on pulling the top together. My husband has been monopolizing the computer struggling to make the decision of whether or not it would be better for him to just get his masters or if he really wants his phd. He knows how much it is to ask us all to continue living in our current circumstances for 7-8 more years feeling like we're never going forward, and then winding up having to pay off school loans for 2 years (more or less.) I'm ready to support him in whatever he decides but part of me would take a sigh of relief for him to be done sooner rather than later. Of course on the other hand calling him Dr. Daddy would make all of us happy and I'd love to know that he went as far as he wanted with his schooling and not just stopped part way to make it easier on us.
Anyway, back to my crafting... I've been crocheting tiny little embroidery floss circles and hoping to add some beads into them (I've been inspired by http://beadknitter.blogspot.com and some of her beautiful knitted beadwork) for a birthday gift for my mom (though I still can't find any in my stash that quite work yet...how that's possible I'm not sure) but I can't finish it until I pick up some chain and little jump rings.
I also picked up the never ending blanket again but I didn't manage to get even through one row before I had to put it down to do my mommy duties. It's so much more rewarding to do small projects where I can see my progress. Those silly little circles whip out in about 3 minutes, if that. Dishcloths/washcloths 3 days max. Scarves a week and a half max. I was going to start a swiffer cover but decided since I don't own a swiffer I should probably see if I can borrow one from someone to make sure I keep it to the right scale. I tend to knit and crochet way too tightly and I'm afraid I'll make a few of them for my mom and they wont even fit her swiffer. Ohh, I want a new project to work on that I can be successful with (that it will be possible for me to finish this year!)
I pulled out a Christmas ornament making kit that looked simple. I'm not sure if it's something that I'll want to keep or not.. but it's something to keep my hands busy. I haven't been able to really get into a project since all of my knitting and crocheting for the Knit for Japan project. I still have to finish my hat but I think everything else is just about ready to go. I really need to rewatch that youtube video on pulling the top together. My husband has been monopolizing the computer struggling to make the decision of whether or not it would be better for him to just get his masters or if he really wants his phd. He knows how much it is to ask us all to continue living in our current circumstances for 7-8 more years feeling like we're never going forward, and then winding up having to pay off school loans for 2 years (more or less.) I'm ready to support him in whatever he decides but part of me would take a sigh of relief for him to be done sooner rather than later. Of course on the other hand calling him Dr. Daddy would make all of us happy and I'd love to know that he went as far as he wanted with his schooling and not just stopped part way to make it easier on us.
Anyway, back to my crafting... I've been crocheting tiny little embroidery floss circles and hoping to add some beads into them (I've been inspired by http://beadknitter.blogspot.com and some of her beautiful knitted beadwork) for a birthday gift for my mom (though I still can't find any in my stash that quite work yet...how that's possible I'm not sure) but I can't finish it until I pick up some chain and little jump rings.
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| Still trying to get them just right.. there are also some flowers in this shot |
I also picked up the never ending blanket again but I didn't manage to get even through one row before I had to put it down to do my mommy duties. It's so much more rewarding to do small projects where I can see my progress. Those silly little circles whip out in about 3 minutes, if that. Dishcloths/washcloths 3 days max. Scarves a week and a half max. I was going to start a swiffer cover but decided since I don't own a swiffer I should probably see if I can borrow one from someone to make sure I keep it to the right scale. I tend to knit and crochet way too tightly and I'm afraid I'll make a few of them for my mom and they wont even fit her swiffer. Ohh, I want a new project to work on that I can be successful with (that it will be possible for me to finish this year!)
Friday, July 1, 2011
Must... have... LESS
Maybe this sounds a little backwards considering the society we currently live in but I feel freed by having less. Every time I bring a bag of anything into our home (be it groceries, clothing, crafting supplies, etc.) it makes me feel anxious. Having to box up your life and pack it into a small space (especially if you do it every year) is very eye opening. My husband and I stood marveling over our little storage pods. Those four little metal things are holding our life is what we said...Though in reality they are holding all the things that hold us back is more like it. Our family is our life, NOT our stuff! On the other hand that's not what we said as we were scrambling boxing up the last of our junk and running it out before the tractor trailer came to pick them up. "What is this?", "Well we can't use it and no one will want it why do we have it??" were common phrases we found ourselves using, getting frustrated with the other person. We filled giant trash bags with my husband's oil, and other grimy unrecognizable chemical stained work clothes and threw them away. We filled MASSIVE double sized plastic totes with my clothing and shoes that I decided I didn't need and donated them... We filled box after box with books and magazines and donated them.... We filled boxes with kitchen supplies and mugs and donated them.... and still I look around at all this excess and wonder how we're still surrounded with "stuff". The problem is that we use 99% of it and if I find something we don't use it goes in the donation box immediately. So what to do... what to do...
Lately, I've been working to cut through my yarn "stash" and have probably used up at least 35%+ on Knit for Japan. Every little piece of yarn left can be linked with a project I'd like to do in the next year and a half (yes, even my little left over pieces.) Somehow, the thought of running out of yarn saddens me... knitting/crochet addicts will attest, no yarn doesn't feel good. Well, with no funds to buy more yarn and me not really wanting to bring any more "stuff" into this house (even if it is yarn.) how can I still have yarn to keep my hands and mind busy? I think most of us have heard of t-shirt yarn, right?? I saw this blog entry at http://www.luckypennymake.com/luckypennymake/ with a tutorial for t-shirt yarn making by a very nice woman named Barbara, got up, picked up my big basket of laundry, walked into my bedroom. After you see how easy it is to make with Barbara's tutorial I think you'll do the same! To be honest I think I got most of my t-shirts in grade school through middle school. I may be young but I'm not fresh out of middle school! I looked at myself in the mirror... clingy, worn out, slightly stained/discolored t-shirt that rides up.... that's what I'm constantly wearing. It doesn't look good.. and although it feels good (as in it's soft) it doesn't feel good to look at. Why do I have all these nice shirts I never wear? Yes, my little boy is doomed to get yellow mustard or some sort of berry juice that will never come out on my shirt... and when that happens, it happens, it's just a shirt. So I grabbed a big plastic bag, dug through my literally overflowing dresser drawers and started throwing shirts in. If it was 100% cotton and wasn't flattering it went in the bag. I kept maybe 2 over-sized shirts that I didn't care for/about for painting, heavy cleaning, etc... but the rest went. I opened my pj drawer and glared at the two granny nightgowns that my mom gave me when I was pregnant. I hate them. They're comfortable and airy, yes. They also are exactly what you see old ladies wearing... they're also 2 sizes to big and make me feel like a blimp. I lived in them for months... I wore them while I was hugely pregnant, after I had 2 surgeries and after I left my job, was depressed and didn't feel like bothering to wear real clothes... they're stained, faded and hideous! They're also 100% cotton. Into the bag they went! Into our closet I went... white clingy, discolored long sleeved shirt, you're 100% cotton? Awesome, I'd never feel comfortable answering the door wearing you anyway! Form fitting t-shirts that don't cover my post-baby stomach properly and are too worn and stretched out to donate? Into the bag with you! Oh, it was so freeing! I nearly filled the bag! I should really take a count before I finish cutting them all up. My dresser drawers actually close now! Granted, I'm a little behind on putting laundry away right now.... So I will have my yarn, I will have another project (crocheting and knitting rag rugs.) and I will have less clothing. All in all it feels like an accomplishment.
Another purging project was that of our socks. Any socks that were worn into holes that I couldn't repair or were so shot they wouldn't stay on our feet they were so stretched out were bunched together and stuffed into a long knee high and given to our dogs as a toy to tug and chew on. The remaining socks will be used to dust and clean with. I learned from this particular purge that my husband doesn't have many socks and he really abuses the ones he has... Me... socks last me years, probably because I'm normally running around barefoot. I'm also a girl and have socks in probably every color of the rainbow... and some of my socks are striped with rainbow colors. Not necessarily my taste but I like getting socks for gifts.. honestly.. sometimes the weirder the better. I normally dress pretty reserved... it's fun to see people's expression when I cross my legs and they get a view of my crazy socks.
On going is our book, movie, cd purge. My husband sold a few of his comics which I know was hard for him, but he did it so that he could have a little spending money for an online Marvel comic book subscription site... It's better for us to have less in our home and opens up the ability for him to read as many comic books as he wants. As I've mentioned before we also both pulled together a bunch of textbooks and books to donate to his college's library book drive. My husband is down to 3 cds... mine.. are somewhere in packed away but I should probably donate mine somewhere also once they're pulled out.
My "de-stuffing" of our life process is currently just picking away. We did those major purges less than a year ago and haven't brought in much more so the bulk of what is going is gone. At this point it's just lessening things slowly and getting rid of what's really worn out and only replacing what's necessity. Although I try to keep this philosophy going in all areas of our home, some things are really hard to let go of.
Pictures... I can't part with, in fact I have a ton I want to print and put in scrapbooks. I hesitate to get started on that right now though.
My son's baby clothes that were kept are in my parent's attic several states away so I don't have to even think about them... but it would be hard to part with them all. Most of the clothing that I wouldn't have emotional trouble parting with are very worn and chances are they wouldn't be as appreciated as I would like to think. Most of it came from bag sales at thrift stores where it couldn't be sold. Much of it is in pretty bad shape... but my mother couldn't turn down $5 for a big bag of baby clothes, and it was worn by my son (if the really tattered stuff was here I'd probably be going baby t-shirt yarn crazy!) The pieces that are in really good shape have a lot of sentimental value.. I didn't buy much for my son when I was pregnant and he didn't have much in his smaller sizes so nearly everything from 0-12 months is something I can remember him wearing all the time.. or I'll remember where I got it from or who gave it to me. Plus... in our current financial situation if we were to have a "surprise" (which I would honestly very, very, very, very happily welcome) I wont have the funds to replace it and having very few friends who could even pass on clothing to us. I feel like I should at least keep staple things such as cloth diapers and baby blankets. At minimum I at least want to keep the blankets that were made by different family members even if we never have another child.
That all being said, I'm slowly trying to part with outgrown toys and clothing that is here. I'm also not keeping every drawing, painting or scribble made by my little boy, I've accepted that I just can't. I'm making an active effort not to just replace things like crayons, markers, paints and playdough when it runs out. I can make playdough when we want to do some sculpting and crayons as well as markers seem to magically appear and our supply seems to somehow get bigger instead of smaller when I think we should be running out. When we were visiting PA and I was cleaning out boxes of my "stuff" that my mom came across we found two giant boxes of crayons that were barely used. Alex will still be writing with crayon when he's in college to use up all the ones we have a this point. Since one of the things we have the least of is paint, we'll have to do some crayon painting! The truth is more like the moment we find a child in our area that is ready for crayons and doesn't have any, we'll be passing on bunches of ours. I hope to replace many of our art supplies with more natural supplies. I would like his art supplies to be more quality over quantity but someone in our financial situation can't really be picky. I don't really buy coloring books. Between what I learned in one of my art for young children courses in college and my own personal beliefs, coloring books are not for us. We have a couple that were gifts and ones that were more activity books than coloring books that I kept for long car trips so that we don't have papers slipping onto the floor, but we use a lot of one sided scrap paper that my mom brought home from work for when we're at home. My husband doesn't even buy notebooks unless one is required. We all use that scrap paper and then recycle it when we're done with it.
I probably in someway should be considered a hoarder. And not just because my apartment is currently a mess. That my friends has been caused by the 2-year-old tornado that has been leaving more destruction in his path than normal. I have the hardest time parting with things that most people would consider trash. Take a top sheet from a set that the fitted sheet has been worn through and I'll hold onto it. It's possibilities are limitless. The ones in our home have been used for kitchen table forts and more currently for dog bedding. Of course this hot weather is making me wish I had kept one for fort use as one of our pups chewed holes in their sheet bedding immediately. Our big thick blankets make the fort too stuffy. And just today I came across an adorable idea for upcycling an Altoid box! Can you believe I found one at my parent's and tossed it in the recycle not even one month ago!?? And of course we've stopped buying non-essential, sugar filled things like mints. Every time someone new comes into our kitchen I get the "didn't you bother taking out your garbage before I came" look because of my counter full of glass jars. Yes, I keep glass jars from some different things to keep left overs in. They're all neatly lined up and clean.. but people just assume they're trash. I can't tell you how many times people helping me clean up after a meal have just tossed them in the recycle to "help me out".... No matter how much I try I can't explain my disdain of plastic food containers to someone who thinks nothing of filling their kitchen with plastics.
Maybe I'm strange in my thought processes... but I actually feel a sense of relief when I can get rid of things or when something has been all used up. I feel like I can breathe when I see empty shelves, collapse and recycle boxes that used to be clogging up my life. Of course, it feels 1,000% better to find usable things that I thought there was no purpose for and re-purpose them for something my family needs or pass them on to someone who will use and appreciate them too.
Lately, I've been working to cut through my yarn "stash" and have probably used up at least 35%+ on Knit for Japan. Every little piece of yarn left can be linked with a project I'd like to do in the next year and a half (yes, even my little left over pieces.) Somehow, the thought of running out of yarn saddens me... knitting/crochet addicts will attest, no yarn doesn't feel good. Well, with no funds to buy more yarn and me not really wanting to bring any more "stuff" into this house (even if it is yarn.) how can I still have yarn to keep my hands and mind busy? I think most of us have heard of t-shirt yarn, right?? I saw this blog entry at http://www.luckypennymake.com/luckypennymake/ with a tutorial for t-shirt yarn making by a very nice woman named Barbara, got up, picked up my big basket of laundry, walked into my bedroom. After you see how easy it is to make with Barbara's tutorial I think you'll do the same! To be honest I think I got most of my t-shirts in grade school through middle school. I may be young but I'm not fresh out of middle school! I looked at myself in the mirror... clingy, worn out, slightly stained/discolored t-shirt that rides up.... that's what I'm constantly wearing. It doesn't look good.. and although it feels good (as in it's soft) it doesn't feel good to look at. Why do I have all these nice shirts I never wear? Yes, my little boy is doomed to get yellow mustard or some sort of berry juice that will never come out on my shirt... and when that happens, it happens, it's just a shirt. So I grabbed a big plastic bag, dug through my literally overflowing dresser drawers and started throwing shirts in. If it was 100% cotton and wasn't flattering it went in the bag. I kept maybe 2 over-sized shirts that I didn't care for/about for painting, heavy cleaning, etc... but the rest went. I opened my pj drawer and glared at the two granny nightgowns that my mom gave me when I was pregnant. I hate them. They're comfortable and airy, yes. They also are exactly what you see old ladies wearing... they're also 2 sizes to big and make me feel like a blimp. I lived in them for months... I wore them while I was hugely pregnant, after I had 2 surgeries and after I left my job, was depressed and didn't feel like bothering to wear real clothes... they're stained, faded and hideous! They're also 100% cotton. Into the bag they went! Into our closet I went... white clingy, discolored long sleeved shirt, you're 100% cotton? Awesome, I'd never feel comfortable answering the door wearing you anyway! Form fitting t-shirts that don't cover my post-baby stomach properly and are too worn and stretched out to donate? Into the bag with you! Oh, it was so freeing! I nearly filled the bag! I should really take a count before I finish cutting them all up. My dresser drawers actually close now! Granted, I'm a little behind on putting laundry away right now.... So I will have my yarn, I will have another project (crocheting and knitting rag rugs.) and I will have less clothing. All in all it feels like an accomplishment.
Another purging project was that of our socks. Any socks that were worn into holes that I couldn't repair or were so shot they wouldn't stay on our feet they were so stretched out were bunched together and stuffed into a long knee high and given to our dogs as a toy to tug and chew on. The remaining socks will be used to dust and clean with. I learned from this particular purge that my husband doesn't have many socks and he really abuses the ones he has... Me... socks last me years, probably because I'm normally running around barefoot. I'm also a girl and have socks in probably every color of the rainbow... and some of my socks are striped with rainbow colors. Not necessarily my taste but I like getting socks for gifts.. honestly.. sometimes the weirder the better. I normally dress pretty reserved... it's fun to see people's expression when I cross my legs and they get a view of my crazy socks.
On going is our book, movie, cd purge. My husband sold a few of his comics which I know was hard for him, but he did it so that he could have a little spending money for an online Marvel comic book subscription site... It's better for us to have less in our home and opens up the ability for him to read as many comic books as he wants. As I've mentioned before we also both pulled together a bunch of textbooks and books to donate to his college's library book drive. My husband is down to 3 cds... mine.. are somewhere in packed away but I should probably donate mine somewhere also once they're pulled out.
My "de-stuffing" of our life process is currently just picking away. We did those major purges less than a year ago and haven't brought in much more so the bulk of what is going is gone. At this point it's just lessening things slowly and getting rid of what's really worn out and only replacing what's necessity. Although I try to keep this philosophy going in all areas of our home, some things are really hard to let go of.
Pictures... I can't part with, in fact I have a ton I want to print and put in scrapbooks. I hesitate to get started on that right now though.
My son's baby clothes that were kept are in my parent's attic several states away so I don't have to even think about them... but it would be hard to part with them all. Most of the clothing that I wouldn't have emotional trouble parting with are very worn and chances are they wouldn't be as appreciated as I would like to think. Most of it came from bag sales at thrift stores where it couldn't be sold. Much of it is in pretty bad shape... but my mother couldn't turn down $5 for a big bag of baby clothes, and it was worn by my son (if the really tattered stuff was here I'd probably be going baby t-shirt yarn crazy!) The pieces that are in really good shape have a lot of sentimental value.. I didn't buy much for my son when I was pregnant and he didn't have much in his smaller sizes so nearly everything from 0-12 months is something I can remember him wearing all the time.. or I'll remember where I got it from or who gave it to me. Plus... in our current financial situation if we were to have a "surprise" (which I would honestly very, very, very, very happily welcome) I wont have the funds to replace it and having very few friends who could even pass on clothing to us. I feel like I should at least keep staple things such as cloth diapers and baby blankets. At minimum I at least want to keep the blankets that were made by different family members even if we never have another child.
That all being said, I'm slowly trying to part with outgrown toys and clothing that is here. I'm also not keeping every drawing, painting or scribble made by my little boy, I've accepted that I just can't. I'm making an active effort not to just replace things like crayons, markers, paints and playdough when it runs out. I can make playdough when we want to do some sculpting and crayons as well as markers seem to magically appear and our supply seems to somehow get bigger instead of smaller when I think we should be running out. When we were visiting PA and I was cleaning out boxes of my "stuff" that my mom came across we found two giant boxes of crayons that were barely used. Alex will still be writing with crayon when he's in college to use up all the ones we have a this point. Since one of the things we have the least of is paint, we'll have to do some crayon painting! The truth is more like the moment we find a child in our area that is ready for crayons and doesn't have any, we'll be passing on bunches of ours. I hope to replace many of our art supplies with more natural supplies. I would like his art supplies to be more quality over quantity but someone in our financial situation can't really be picky. I don't really buy coloring books. Between what I learned in one of my art for young children courses in college and my own personal beliefs, coloring books are not for us. We have a couple that were gifts and ones that were more activity books than coloring books that I kept for long car trips so that we don't have papers slipping onto the floor, but we use a lot of one sided scrap paper that my mom brought home from work for when we're at home. My husband doesn't even buy notebooks unless one is required. We all use that scrap paper and then recycle it when we're done with it.
I probably in someway should be considered a hoarder. And not just because my apartment is currently a mess. That my friends has been caused by the 2-year-old tornado that has been leaving more destruction in his path than normal. I have the hardest time parting with things that most people would consider trash. Take a top sheet from a set that the fitted sheet has been worn through and I'll hold onto it. It's possibilities are limitless. The ones in our home have been used for kitchen table forts and more currently for dog bedding. Of course this hot weather is making me wish I had kept one for fort use as one of our pups chewed holes in their sheet bedding immediately. Our big thick blankets make the fort too stuffy. And just today I came across an adorable idea for upcycling an Altoid box! Can you believe I found one at my parent's and tossed it in the recycle not even one month ago!?? And of course we've stopped buying non-essential, sugar filled things like mints. Every time someone new comes into our kitchen I get the "didn't you bother taking out your garbage before I came" look because of my counter full of glass jars. Yes, I keep glass jars from some different things to keep left overs in. They're all neatly lined up and clean.. but people just assume they're trash. I can't tell you how many times people helping me clean up after a meal have just tossed them in the recycle to "help me out".... No matter how much I try I can't explain my disdain of plastic food containers to someone who thinks nothing of filling their kitchen with plastics.
Maybe I'm strange in my thought processes... but I actually feel a sense of relief when I can get rid of things or when something has been all used up. I feel like I can breathe when I see empty shelves, collapse and recycle boxes that used to be clogging up my life. Of course, it feels 1,000% better to find usable things that I thought there was no purpose for and re-purpose them for something my family needs or pass them on to someone who will use and appreciate them too.
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