Happier Things...

Wild Flowers Picked By Tiny hands

 

 

 

DS's First Time Making Spinach Lasagna

Silly Faces From A Very Proud Little Boy

Finished Lasagna

My First Attempt At Banana Bread In A Very Long Time

I could write for hours about the drama that has leeched its way into my life right now.. and I probably have in the past.  Writing has always been my way of getting the pent up frustration OUT.  Not this time though.  This time it's too painful to think about and I'd rather just concentrate on the happiness in my life. 

My apartment is a disaster (This isn't necessarily a bad thing right?  It means we're just having too much fun).... but it was even more of a disaster yesterday when I took the lasagna making pictures.  Thankfully my little guy was happy to stand at the counter on the step stool eating a snack while I accomplished much more than he would normally "allow".  I am in love with so many things in this stage of his development.  Of course there are still temper tantrums and 2-3 year old stubborn-ness.... but there are also so many more things that he is eager to experience and that I am MORE than happy to experience with him.  I haven't really let him help me with large activities in the kitchen until now.  I didn't feel like he listened well enough to not be playing with an electrical outlet or a sharp knife the moment I turned my back.  I still have a little bit of fear of that happening but he listens so much better to me now.... now my biggest problem is "No, sweet heart we really DO have enough spice in what we're making"  I thought for sure he had thrown a few extra pinches (more like handfuls) of pepper, salt and garlic into the lasagna when I went to wash my hands from the raw eggs... but it tasted just fine!  

We yet again "lucked out" with the horrible storms plaguing the south.  Nearly 200 (at last my last viewing of the news) people perished from the latest string of tornadoes.  Having had the last one come so uncomfortably close... to the point of nearly getting caught in it (we had been in one of the areas worst hit less than an hour before it went through) I did not sleep much Wed night.  Our son fell asleep on our couch and I knew with as hot as it would be in our bed where he normally winds up that I would just leave him there.  However, I couldn't leave him there alone with what I had seen on the news that was headed our way.  The least of my worries is how many toys are strewn through my home.  Seriously, who cares about those sticky finger prints on the the front of the stove other than me? 

I'm making an active effort to not let myself stress over the future.. who is promising me that there is one?  Yes, we may be moving yet again in a year and a half from now but there's no point of stressing over it.  All I can do is just continue the simplifying of our lives and continue passing things on to people who really need things I can easily live with out. 

I'd much rather fill my life with enjoyment than worry.. My life has been filled with fear and worry for far too long.  If I want to experiment with a recipe I find that we just happen to have the ingredients for.. that's what I should do.  I find myself always sticking to the same recipes that I just know by heart because I'm too afraid to make a mistake and waste any food.  Even my husband tries to stop me from experimenting.. but he didn't complain AFTER he tasted the banana bread I made that he swore he wouldn't like.  Instead of constantly beating myself up over not being the *best* baker, cook, knitter, crocheter.. I just TRY.. such a concept right?  Well it is for me.... I've been so afraid of wasting the yarn I bought I've hesitated to work with anything other than scraps or yarn that my mother found me at a thrift store (several skeins and left over pieces of crewel yarn for 50 cents is kind of worth a shot in my book.)  Instead of stressing over the fact that I'm not perfect and blaming myself for every mess made in this home I seriously NEED to take time to sit down and craft.. or contemplate lesson plans or activity for my little one to enjoy.  I may not get a shot at being a mom again..  I'd rather live in a messy home than miss out on experiences with him. 

First Yarn Along

Well I decided it's time to get back to the blogging world as I need SOMETHING to concentrate on other than the drama that has start creeping into my life.  One of the things that keeps me sane is Wednesdays and the Yarn Along over at Small Things.  I really love looking at all the creativity everyone shares in the Yarn Along.  I'm always so hesitant to get involved in anything.... My attitude is "well who wants to look at my junk"... or "it's just not good enough"but then why do I have a blog if I'm not going to at least try??

Below is a collection of somethings I've just managed to finish off.. 3 knit dish cloths 2 of which are in a stitch I hadn't tried before (they are bundled together in the center).  I thought they came out quite well.  I can't wait to wash them and use them.  My dishcloths are looking quite tattered lately and it will be nice to be able to add some color to my kitchen!  The rest in this picture are a ton of varying sized crocheted flowers.. I'm still trying to get them just right but for my first attempts they turned out ok.  The last handmade piece is a knit heart that looks quite a bit better at the angle I had hoped my camera would catch a shot of.  No such luck!  My husband just returned "Animal Farm" to the library so I wasn't able to catch a shot of it... but I had never read it and he read it aloud to me since we both wanted to read it and I'm always moving around too much to sit still and read over his shoulder.  Sounds silly to have someone read to you at my age but hey.. it was kind of fun.  The book in the picture is one of my upcoming projects.  It is a journal my mother gave to me that is meant to share "my story" with my son. 

Here is my crocheted blanket that I've blogged about before.. It's getting quite large (perhaps close to 2 and 1/2 feet.. however it's also getting unbearably hot working on it.  I've been hoping the craft store will put the yarn it requires on sale so I can purchase enough to complete the blanket and tuck it away until cooler weather arrives!

In other happenings around this circus we were able to locate video of the abuse towards the animals in the lab where our dogs came from.  The footage was horrific.. it makes me feel even more strongly against animal testing in ANY circumstances where it can be avoided.  I honestly don't know how the lab workers could live with themselves doing some of the things they did to the animals.. and I am not talking about the experimenting.. I'm talking about the mistreatment of the animals even outside of the testing.  I know people have mixed feelings about PETA but I am VERY glad that they stepped in and had the animals removed.

The rain outside and flickering power tells me storms are on their way.  I am very much so hoping that we will again avoid damaging storms.  The large storm a few weeks ago that brought tornadoes that killed quite a few people in our state came with in a few miles of our complex and crushed area where we had been only hour or less before having no idea that the storm was headed our way.  I feel so very thankful that the tornado avoided our part of town but also very saddened for those whose lives it took.  I wish that we were able to assist those who it had affected but unfortunately the items we were able to donate were not needed.  I suppose that is in a way not unfortunate as that means other people were there to help... but it makes me a bit sad that I cannot offer anymore than well wishes to those still struggling.

Moving on...

Some time about a week ago I wrote a very long, very saddened post about some of the people in (and out) my life.  Towards the end of the post I started working on uploading some crafting and life pictures.. but my computer battery lost power before I could get it plugged in.  Although the post was saved as a draft I decided not to finish it and post it.  I can't say that I'm "over it" all nor that I will be over it any time soon.. but I need to just move on.  There will always be people who relish in my unhappiness and people who try to use me and hurt me and that's just the way it is. Anyway, on to slightly happier things.

Our new furry-boys managed to grab hold of my husband's camera's sd card after the last time I uploaded photos.  Thankfully it was AFTER I uploaded photos and not after but it also makes me nervous that I don't have CDs/DVDs unpacked yet so that I can back up the photos on my computer... The thought of loosing all of my son's pictures from the past two years terrifies me.  I hope to at least locate dvds today and get them backed up MULTIPLE times by the end of the week.  I'm thinking of mailing copies to my parent's house so that if there was a fire or something that I had back ups elsewhere.  I hate to do that as I have breastfeeding pictures which were my first moments with my son after my "emergency c-section" and hours of separation... With my luck my mother will immediately print ALL of our pictures and take them to show them to everyone she knows..

Spring has quite definitely sprung in NC (pictures to come later) but I'm continuously finding hints of FALL, not winter, but fall on our long walks.  I can only imagine how jealous my friends the PA squirrels would be if they knew of the abundance of acorns scattered over our sidewalks, grass and still clinging to leaf-bare trees!

I think I've seen maybe 3 squirrels in total since we moved here and they all hang close to the lake down the street from us (again.. pictures to come later!)  There is so much beauty here.. not that there wasn't where we lived before but there is something about this neighborhood that is just gorgeous.. maybe it's the gigantic library a little over a mile away, maybe it's the trails around every corner, or perhaps it's the lake and wildlife that surrounds it steps from our complex.. but if we had a place of our own (non-apartment) I would probably truly be in heaven.  Some days on our walks I feel like I'm in a dreamland. 

I've been horrible at getting pictures of my art work lately.. I've resorted to using my old camera that does not take the best pictures and the indoor light tends to be very difficult to capture pictures in.  I managed to whip off 4 full dish cloths to send back to PA with my parents when they visited so that a few members of my extended family would have a small Easter gift from us.  I made about a gallon of liquid hand soap from a ziplock full of tiny broken soap bars from random places (hotel stays mostly) for the cost of a gallon of distilled water ($1.20 I believe?)  I ran out of empty soap pumps (for once I got rid of something I should have kept, ha) and refilled the gallon jug from the water (more than half way.)  Some days it seems like I'm plowing through yarn....

This is one of my latest yarn purchases with what is left of my gift card for the craft store.   I can't remember exactly when I purchased it but it couldn't have been much more than two weeks ago.. w/in less than a week the two stripped skeins to the left were gone. as they're what I used for dish cloths.  I have a little nub of the red left over and a stitch holder holding together the left over piece knit into most of a dish cloth.  I picked up 3 more skeins (well 5 if you count the two that my mother purchased for me to knit her a scarf to go with her new winter coat) over the weekend as well as my first pair of circular needles and my first set of double pointed needles.  My mom was nice enough to purchase the circular needles that I was so excited to try out.  Of course demon dog managed to get a hold of them and they are no more :'-(  Well.. it's not that they're no more.. but I'll never get to use them for a real project..  I'm pretty much just using it as I would straight needles.. The cable is so chewed I'm sure it would catch on the yarn and fray it.  Most of what I get stuck using is acrylic (I really, really love cotton and have never had the opportunity to try wool or any "good" yarn) so maybe it wouldn't really matter.. I guess I'll find out since I don't have $70 to blow on a nice set of interchangeable needles.. especially since I have a demon dog (I really do love him and say that in the most loving way possible) looking to chew through them.  

I'm trying really hard to just be appreciative of what I have and not stress over the things that get destroyed.. they're just things... if I don't have it, I'll just have to live with out it.  I have to admit there are little things that we've been given or picked up here and there for little to no money that have significantly made my life easier.. like my new drainers.. They make rinsing beans and quinoa SO much easier!  They even hook over the edges of our double sink (something else I'm thankful for) and allow me to use our hose in the sink (something I've never really had and am VERY thankful for!)

 

I know my husband is always saying that I "always want something" but I think he fails to notice that most things I "want" are things that tend to make our lives easier and most of the time I'm more than happy to just live with out.  Of course there's always things on my wish list.. like more children, a fancy set of interchangeable knitting needles, a more dependable vehicle that fits all of us more comfortably, a home of our own...  you know.. the things/ life you can dream of but aren't begging for because you know that they aren't realistic at the time..  My list of non-necessities that I'm asking for right now are some shower curtain hangers so that I can set up a spare shower curtain that was a moving in gift from one of our last complexes in our spare bathroom (of course I always have my eyes peeled for nice baskets to help keep us organized and a heavy duty laundry basket but I've been on that search for going on 3 years)... Wow, I want to spend a whole dollar!  I realize that a dollar is a dollar and with no one working we really shouldn't spend a penny but it would be nice to allow my parents to shower in the bathroom off of my son's room when they're in to visit instead of trying to make 1 small bathroom work for 5 people.  This honestly is not meant to sound like a husband rant, I think sometimes he forgets the costs that are involved with maintaining a house hold outside of our $40 a week grocery budget...  We do occasionally need to pick up paper products (about once every 3 months) and about once a year I run low certain cleaning supplies (I tend to buy refillable bottles and a bulk bottle or something that needs to be diluted.. There are moments I want to remind him of the things that the "average" woman likes to spend money on.. like new clothes, jewelry, shoes, purses, make up, etc.  I purchase 90% of my son's clothing (that is not handed down for free) from 75%+ off racks and thrift stores.. Other than a few pieces of maternity clothing (6 or so pieces? 2 pairs of pants and 3-4 tops) the last piece of clothing I purchased was before we were married.
Well now that I've found a radio station that makes me feel uplifted I suppose it is time to get back to my house work so there is time for fun tonight once DH gets home from the library.. some spring break he's having!

Happy Changes

THEY HAVE ARRIVED!!!

We are very happy to have our two furry little additions to our home.  These furry little bundles of joy had a rough start to life.  My best guess is that they were puppy mill pups then purchased by a lab to test flea and tick medications.  Their ears and bellies are tattooed with some sort of id number that suggests that their birth date is in 2009 making them two years old or close to it.  PETA intervened with the lab due to poor conditions and care of the animals being tested on and removed over one HUNDRED dogs from their facility last year.  For the past year a family in Raliegh fostered these two through TRIbeagle rescue that saved many of these dogs and put them into foster homes.  I'm not necessarily against animal testing.. something that would surprise probably anyone who knows me and knows how much I love animals.  I would obviously rather a different kind of animal be tested on... my suggestion inmates behind bars for life.  At any rate.. to use flea and tick medications they DO have to eventually be tested on the subject they are meant for... just as medical interventions have to eventually be tested on humans before they become accepted methods of care.  However, that does not excuse poor treatment of test subjects human, animal or otherwise..  If you're testing on a plant you have to treat it well enough so that it does not die or fail to thrive.. otherwise your test subject isn't going to put out sufficient information that gives accurate results.  If that alone isn't enough of a reason to properly treat test animals, I don't know what is! 

Anyway, enough of that rant.  We are very happy to have our boys with us.  It makes me sad to see how skiddish they are and how any quick movement or noise seems to terrify them.  It doesn't stop them from bonding with us at times but they're still having trouble coming to us when we want to take them outside.. they seem afraid of being put on their leashes and being the escape artists beagles tend to be they are difficult to catch when they get loose.  In a matter of the 4 days they have been with us the one managed to get loose twice when my husband was walking them. 

The culprit....

DS makes their adjustment all the more difficult.  Although the boys are used to small children as their foster family had 3 or 4 children, my DS is so overly excited about having them he chases them and tries to make a game of tag out of the chase..  Needless to say the boys are not a fan of being tackled, hit unintentionally and loved to death by a little boy.  Having three two-year-olds between DS and the two furry boys is enough to make me pull my hair out, yet I don't feel nearly as frustrated as I did some days when I only had one two-year-old to deal with.  Something about having all the activity in our home makes it feel more like home.  Not that I necessarily enjoy THREE "children" crying through out the night and three sets of "bathroom" incidents.. a bad case of diaper rash and more dirty diapers than one can count in a day from one.. and multiple "accidents" in the form of legs lifting on my furniture and random instances of # 2 on my carpet... but it doesn't inspire anger or frustration which I cannot exactly explain why. For some reason I even laughed when "my" boy lifted his leg on my spot bot cleaner which has been my best friend the past few days..  You would think having to scrub the carpet multiple times a day, running up and down 3 flights of stairs sometimes multiple times an hour, being kept awake by whining (as well as accidents and random items being chewed up) at night and having DS wake crying over his sore behind after only an hour or two of sleep would make me crazy.. Maybe I'm just delirious with no sleep!

"My" boy.. DH seems to favor our pup in blue

 

 

 

 

Oh right, this is supposed to be my crafting blog... enough talk about these new additions..  Here's what I've been up to....

The bane of my existence...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Well as you can see from the pile of crap the blanket I'm working on is thrown, I've been spending most of my free time crocheting and not picking up after my two human boys... Comics and Thomas trains....  I did clean the kitchen on Valentine's day..  Since we don't really celebrate it as a holiday I considered that and the homemade valentine's DS and I made as well as a decent dinner made at home my gifts to DH.  I wish I could say that my kitchen is still in decent shape but it's worse than ever less than two days later! 

Considering our apartment is to be inspected tomorrow, I know I need to get working on the condition of our apartment today.. Of course with above mentioned two-year-olds.... my time would be better spent sticking a fork into an electrical outlet. 

Trying, trying, trying

Trying to keep the broken crayon population to a minimum....

I have to say my lousy picture taking skills don't nearly do them justice... They turned out beautifully!

Another batch.. just as nice.. but I was a bit over-zealous getting them into the freezer and did so before they were set.  I think DS may like the broken one even more because it's pointer than the rest.  I'm wishing I had held out and kept trying to find a star-mold because there are more easy to use points on them.. but the hearts are cute and my cutey likes them!

My little one trying out the new doggie bed with his best friend Lo-Lo the bunny puppet.  I just managed to click this shot before he moved Lo-Lo to block his entire face!  We watched an episode of Dogtown on Netflix this evening and it really broke my heart... Come on come on dog rescue.. call me in the morning.  We have a loving family just waiting for a furry little baby to love...

I've really been feeling the need for tea lately.  My mom must have known and brought this along as a birthday present for me.  It is NOT the decaffeinated one.. no wonder I've been feeling so good after drinking it!  However, that may also be the reason I couldn't get back to sleep last night after DS's wakefull eczema scratch fest.. I was wide awake from 1AM-6AM.  By some miracle DS decided to sleep until 11AM!!!  I don't believe that has EVER happened.  Of course DH is feeling under the weather and I have been feeling some pre-cold symptoms that I've been trying to blame on "dry air".. maybe all 3 of us are about to embark on our first North Carolina cold!

Some candle making commenced this week.  Left over unburnt pieces from candles were melted down into almost full votive size.  Local (to where I was living in PA) beeswax on the left (brownish/yellowy color) and some cinnamon Christmas candle(red on right) wax that my mom gave to me.  At some point the wicks drowned so she gave me the tin (the candles are sitting on the lid to this tin)and all to upcycle.  I've already managed to burn down these candles.. of course I still somehow managed to have some wax left over.. it smells way too nice to just toss in the trash so the next votive will be a mix of the two.  I'm sure I'm somehow doing something against the rules.. heck maybe I'm polluting my house while obsessively burning all my excess wax drippings.  I will have to do a little research on that.  I try to avoid artificial fragrances because of the damage they do to your body.. I'd hate to find out my waste-not-want-not-ing is actually hurting us.  Speaking of waste not want not.. like the crystal bowl? One of my favorite thrift store finds.. it's good quality crystal that I found for under a dollar! 

My mom brought something else naughty along aside from wax and tea to keep me busy.  She also brought me a giant bag of yarn, what is left over from her last bout of crocheting addiction before she went back to work when I was little.  She also gave me an extra crochet hook she had and taught me how to do some crocheting.  I have to admit I'm not very good.  The uneven "thing" above is my first rows.. the below less uneven, bumpy thing with the crochet hook popping out is my first project.  DH made his first handmade request.. He wants a blanket that is big enough for our bed....  I don't think he has ANY clue how much work that is and what a massive undertaking that is for someone who has been crocheting less than 4 days!  He never asks me to make him anything.. so I'm on it!  I was stunned to find two skeins of yarn didn't last much more than 5 rows! 

HOLY CRAP BATMAN! I only have so much time in a day to sneak in some crocheting.  At this rate I might be done by Christmas 2020.  This project of projects did lead to an awfully wonderful evening though.  Finding out that there is no way the 5 or so skeins of white yarn were going to make a blanket big enough for our bed I decided a trip to A.C.Moore was in order.  Because it is "his" blanket I made DH go along.  He agreed to the cheapest option which happened to be light blue and white.  He didn't realize until we were on our way home that it is the colors of his school's RIVALS!  He did origionally ask for white and red but I told him the red would bleed and it would be come pink and red.  We choose cream at first when we got to the store but then did the math and realized the light blue was the cheaper option.  I *did* have a nice (cheap) set of crochet hooks in my basket to use my 40% off coupon on.. but then we walked by the Thomas train set that was meant for children to play with in the store and DS was bullied a bit by an UNATTENDED little boy not much older than him when he tried to play.  I think the unattended part bothers me more than the bullying part.  Anyway, that just made me turn around, put the hooks back and I picked out Toby the train who came out to be just a little over $5 after the coupon.  DS plays with his little wooden Thomas trains that have magnets attached to them for hours every day.  He likes to ask me about the other trains he has seen on the movie.  His favorites to ask for are Gordon, Henry and Toby, so when I saw them and saw how calmly he reacted to the bratty little munchkin in the store I decided my gift card would be better spent on my little man. 


Considering a new toy was directly followed by pizza across the street, DS was a very happy little boy!  We rarely eat out since we really can't afford to, but a great coupon and some birthday money made tonight a really special night for DS and I.  I can't say for sure but I think DH enjoyed himself too.. it was hard to tell with all the whining about how he was getting sick.  Men are such babies!